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Many people share the belief that it is an unselfish act to put everyone else’s wants and needs ahead of their own. But at what cost to you? Keeping your identity separate from your role as a caregiver can be difficult when your connections and interests are mostly determined by the needs of others. Consequently your personal identity, often takes a backseat. I am not referring to your name, rank and serial number but how you see yourself and your situation and it’s impact on your sense of freedom to think about yourself and your needs.

When was the last time you checked in and asked yourself “What do I need?

Giving attention to yourself requires acknowledging and accepting your own needs as well as the needs of others. If you’re like me, I used to think that the most challenging aspects of self care where finding the time to focus on myself, when the real obstacle was making it my priority. Taking care of yourself, means that are your priority by becoming mindful of the time you spend refueling and restoring your energy with restful activities that interest you. Consider saying to yourself, “little things mean a lot” and start scheduling your time by developing daily self care routines and activities that are both enjoyable and manageable for YOU.

Here are some self care tips that I enjoy and maybe you will like them to:
~ Spending time with my pets.
~ Soaking up the sun in my lounge chair.
~ Letting go and Laughing: listen to CD’s
(comedies are my personal favorite)
~ Reading a book (a cheap way to take a vacation).
~ Talk with Friends (Unload with an old fashion …. session)
~ Rejuvenate with sleep and nutrition & (good old fashion fattening deserts)
~ Let someone take care of you, by scheduling a hair/nail appointment and go!
~

Refuel, Restore and Rejuvenate
Your Life and Loving Heart

Let go and leave behind part of your heavy load with this Self Care Tracking Strategy

By using this chart as a daily or weekly reminder, you will have created a visual representation of the self care practices and time being spent on your rejuvenation.

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD CHART

Now you can decide whether or not you are spending enough time making decisions that benefit your well being. If not, what shifts are needed that will benefit you?

1 .There were positive changes:

~  $6.6 Million in new developmental services caseload funding in Governor’s Budget

~  Passage of Walk with your Class law allowing special education students staying on in school to be part of graduation ceremonies.

~  Unanimous passage of the Autism Insurance law that requires insurers to cover early intervention services for children with autism age 18 months to 6 years old.

~ Pending Dept. of Education Regulations on Restrictive Behavioral Interventions [RBI] in Vermont schools (commitment made to House Committee on Education)

~  Challenges for Changes II law includes initiatives for pilot programs to support people with severe functional disability in the community to prevent corrections system involvement.

2.  Cuts in Governor’s Budget & Challenges for Change reductions were reversed:

~  Children’s  Personal Care Services  ($1 million)

~ Targeted Case Management for 380 people and families continues  ($595,0000)

~ Flexible Family Funding ($475,000)

~ Children with Special Health Needs Respite ($95,000)

~ Developmental service cuts limited to 1% ~ $1.5 million instead of $7 million (5%)

3.  We still need to monitor and be ready to respond to Challenge for Change Bill initiatives that could hurt children and adults, including:

~  Consolidation of Children’s Integrated Services – $2 million reduction could impact early intervention.

~ Expand developmental service residential options — could impact quality and safety of placements.

~ Consolidation of employment supports – could change priorities & reduce job supports.

~ Public Safety Home & Community Based Waiver Re-evaluations – could decrease key supports.

~ Reduced special education spending & regionalized special education services.

~ Proposed Developmental Disability Act regulations that delete families make self-management harder & create emergency priority wait lists.

Exploring who you really are and connecting to your true self is a journey that only you can take and the only way to find your answer.

Is your life one of your own choosing?

What if your experiences are directly related to what you are “cultivating” in your life. More often than not the external influences you identify with have little to do with who you really are. If you begin to examine yourself through eyes of sincere awareness, you will begin to experience your true self and thereby influence things as never before. One way to do that is to ask yourself, do your thoughts and beliefs fluctuate or create illusions based on what others see as having value, or do they reflect you’re true self ?

Symbolic of gardening, the pathway to cultivating your true self is in rooted living. Not unlike a garden, cultivating your true self takes time, patience and hard work whereas cultivating weeds (false sense of self) does not. Your first step towards identifying with your true self involves awareness of how outside influences impact your perception of how you see yourself. By doing so, you will be exploring the person you were meant to be before being distracted by outside influences and expectations. Among these distractions are material possessions, experiences, accomplishments, fears and worries that you relate to social status or expectations.

Who is your biggest critic or champion and what is it that you identify with that alters your thoughts of insecurity into security or fear into self confidence?

BELIEFS & ILLUSIONS: why not ask yourself are your thoughts and actions consistent or inconsistent with the ways that you live and your true self?
~~~~~~~
Belief: What I do defines me
Illusion: my success or social status matter and give me value.
By knowing my true self: I am confident and found and belief in the value that is MYSELF.
~~~~~~~
Belief: What I have defines me.
Illusion:my material wealth defines my value.
By knowing my true self: I already have what I need within ME.
~~~~~~~
Belief: What others do, have, or think about me defines me. Illusion: What matters to others matters to everyone and that makes me valuable.
By knowing my true self: I accept myself as having value and therefore have no need to compare MYSELF to others.
~~~~~~~
“Your very life depends on everything
recurring ’til we answer from within.
Robert Frost

I was more than willing to share my thoughts on this but not being an attorney my comments/questions where not intended to address guilt or innocence but rather the degree of responsibility this young man had for himself prior to the murder. Was he held responsible for his actions in other situations that required him to use personal judgement? If not, were there issues/concerns regarding his ability to be safe, if so why put into public situations without support? In my opinion identifying a diagnosis as a reason for culpability is a legal maneuver that may contribute to a defense but at what cost? It is not that I am unsympathetic as I have a son who is in his twenties and diagnoses with aspergers but:

be careful not lose ground by undermining this message.

That is my opinion what is yours?

1 ½ hrs of fun with horses, time to bond, groom, learn feeding and learn to ride. I am only taking 3 people per session.

Instructor – Helen Hipp - Certified life coach and credentialed mental health professional and sole proprietor of WithInU Life Coaching.

The coaching and caring group is a five week program. Encouraging self discovery, this program involves fun and exciting hands on equine activities!

Location: Riverview Farm                                                                     Governor Chittenden Rd. Williston, Vermont   05495

Group Focus: To provide adults with special needs enjoyable  opportunities and to enhances their self esteem and confidence by  practicing skills such as following directions, task completion, and  awareness of the importance of  reliability and attention to detail.

Cost: The fee is $ 25.00 per session for a five-session program for a  total of $125.00 per person. Each session lasts for an hour and a  half.

About the Group Facilitator: As a coach and group facilitator I  support the uniqueness of individuals by encouraging clients to  view their personal transitions as amazing growth opportunities.  My approach is highly creative, compassionate and tailored to the  unique needs of each individual.

Medicaid Waver May Cover Coaching Fees

To register or if you have any questions please contact me  at www.helen@withinulifecoaching.com or if you prefer you can                                                        contact me at 802 899-2128/cell 238-0822

Helen C. Hipp, MA                                                                                                             WithInU Life Coaching

build upon their independent life skills and enhance their lives. Participants will learn and practice skills for making friends, initiating
conversation, making decisions, expressing feelings, and managing disappointments. Starting April 20th the group will meet for five weeks every Tuesday at 5:15 p.m.for 1 hour and 15 minutes, and the last group will be held on May 18th  2010.

“The person who really wants to do something finds a way; the other person finds an excuse”. ~ Author Unknown

Many of those thoughts/beliefs associated with feeling stuck share some common symptoms. Denial is an expression of stuckness that demonstrates an individual’s inability to adapt to change. Expressions of denial can be made with words and/or actions and sometimes they are one in the same. For example the use of word “can/not” may first appear to indicate not having a choice when the intention of it’s use is to fabricate excuses with rationalizations or justifications. The payoff, is in the maneuver – the redirection of responsibility. That is not to say that every time the word “cannot” is used that it shares this meaning. There have been many times that I have said things like ” I cannot help you this weekend because…. (here comes the action with my rationalizations or justifications ) where as I have also said “I cannot help you right now” (indicating I did feel I had a choice).

The reality of feeling that stuck – recognized, someimes it’s avoided, and sometimes it just isn’t realized.

Symptoms of Stuckness (SOS)

Negativity: It’s hard to reach your full potential when your busy telling yourself what you can’t do! Ask yourself is your attitude part of your solution or part of your problem?

Why not try: Keeping your eyes focused on your goals instead of the obstacles and challenges that stand in your path. Anyone can create a problem that will leave themselves feeling “stuck” but why would you want too? Remember you are in control of your own reality and your perception dictates the way you see things.

Blaming: Don’t waste time slinging mud, blaming others keeps you stuck an unable to focus on solutions. Ask yourself if it really is someone else’s fault. Are you really that powerless?

Why not try: Accepting responsibility and make your voice heard, and your life your own!

Narrow mindedness: If you have an idea that has been stuck for a while, then why not ask yourself, “what other opportunities are here”?

Why not try: Exploring different perspectives and use your strengths to create leverage in your favor. Do that and you have created leverage that will help to bring about change.

Helen